For her, it’s always been a difficult search. In her enemies’ eyes, all the “"-gates’’ of scandal lead to her. To them she is Haldeman, Erhlichman and Mitchell rolled into one – and Republicans hope she may one day have the court dates to prove it. To her admirers, she is Margaret Mead, Eleanor Roosevelt and Joan of Arc rolled into one – and she already has the scars of political martyrdom to prove it. To the late-night talk-show hosts, of course, she is now the flaky New Age matron under the guidance of a suddenly famous guru.
But on a pedestrian level, Hillary is a typical member of her generation. The family in the White House is always, somehow, a reflection of the times. That means this is the age of baby-boomer midlife anxieties, and the country is buffeted by their quest for ways to cope with the many reckonings they face. For the First Lady, middle age is turning out to be especially difficult: a special prosecutor may be closing in.
Perhaps her most important coping mechanism is consulting with her lawyers. But there are many others. One strategy is to slip out of the White House, anonymously. When she and a friend recently walked home from Sidwell (where Chelsea has just completed her junior year), they even bought lemonade from a 5-year-old. Mrs. Clinton was ebullient when she got back to the mansion. ““It felt so normal!’’ she exclaimed. She has taken other incognito strolls to the Corcoran Gallery and to the National Zoo. ““Seeing lots of ordinary people,’’ says a friend, ““helps her keep things in perspective.''
Then there are the ““bracelet people.’’ They are the eight women who gave Hillary a birthday memento in 1993, inscribed with all of their initials. Among them are Arkansas-born actress Mary Steenburgen, Hollywood producer Linda Bloodworth-Thomason and political scientist Diane Blair. The less sentimental might point out that Bloodworth-Thomason’s husband, Harry, may have been one of the proximate causes of ““Travelgate,’’ and that Blair’s husband helped Hillary earn a suspiciously quick and easy $100,000 profit in cattle futures back in Arkansas. Still, Hill- ary relies on them for chats about real life. They talk about ““normal things,’’ says Blair, ““like a close friend who just became a grandmother. Or my youngest child, who’s teaching first grade.''
There is the balm of travel, sometimes with Chelsea in the manner of the Victorian matron taking her daughter on a Grand Tour. But these are grand tours with a social conscience, to investigate health care, examine the plight of subjugated women, or explore the culture of the Near East. This week, without Chelsea in tow, Hillary will embark on a long-planned trip through Eastern Europe.
Her faith is critical: Mrs. Clinton sees herself as a serious Christian. ““It’s a driving force within her,’’ says Dr. Dan Thomason, Harry’s brother and Hillary’s optometrist in Little Rock. A songwriter who authors Christian music, Dan Thomason recently penned a new hymn, and performed it for the First Lady when she was in Arkansas this spring. ““I was lost, then you came and found me,’’ he sang. ““Take my hand, stay by me.’’ When he saw her off at the airport later, she whispered: ““Stay by me.''
Still, it’s tough to remain upbeat. Hillary’s mother, Dorothy Rodham, expressed concern recently, telling friends that her daughter’s ““smile doesn’t match her eyes anymore.’’ Beset by allegations of misconduct from the Whitewater land deal to security at the White House, Hillary has confessed to a friend that it’s ““hard to keep laughing.’’ She doesn’t read scandal stories in the papers anymore, just two- or three-sentence summaries furnished by staff. Yet she cannot abide pity. ““I’m great – I’m doing fine,’’ she responds breezily. But you have to wonder what she’s really thinking when she walks back home.
